Grief, Gratitude, and the Power of Prayer

As many of you know, I recently lost my father after a 16-year battle with Parkinson’s disease. My family and I are ever so grateful for the prayers and love expressed to us during this difficult time. As someone who walks with you through the valley of the shadow of death, reminding you that your Good Shepherd is right beside you, it means all the more for you to do that for me. On behalf of my mother and the entire rest of my family, thank you.

There I go again, finding comfort through gratitude in the midst of my grief. I have to say, though, it really works! This long journey has led me, time and time again, to practice what I preach. Finding ways to say thank you in the midst of life’s dark moments brings a glimmer of hope and even joy as we notice God‘s gifts in the midst of loss.

Expressions of gratitude don’t remove the loss, or even the pain of the loss. It is, as Ecclesiastes 3 puts it, the “time for” those things. However, an attitude of gratitude blunts the blow and allows us to see God at work through it all.

I’ve been losing my dad slowly for the better part of two decades. Along the way, I have made a special effort to see God working good in the midst of something that is very not good. For instance, my father had to retire early from his dream job as a denominational official in the Baptist church. Mom and dad had always wanted to settle in southwest Illinois for their retirement. I think it was for my mother‘s sake, since she is an avid gardener and they have good dirt down there. So when the time came for them to move, my dad‘s Parkinson’s made the choice of a house much more complex. After much searching, they came upon a ranch-style house in Highland, Illinois. It had already been modified to be handicap accessible on the entire main floor, and it sat on a double lot with a beautiful gazebo in the back and lots of good dirt. I won’t tell you how much they paid for it. You could hardly buy a garage for that much in Elmhurst! That house has been a persistent blessing in the midst of a slow-moving tragedy. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve thanked God for that house, and every time I did, I received a strange comfort and even joy.

Turns out, that was only one of a long string of blessings that God would provide in the midst of this terrible situation. So many times just the right thing happened at just the right time. When my mother couldn’t care for my father anymore, there was a beautiful assisted living center right in town that took him on short notice. This newfound freedom lifted a crushing burden for my mom and allowed her to start multiple Bible studies, including one at that same facility. My parents’ life change made room for people to grow in their knowledge of Jesus. It wasn’t a coincidence. Thank you God.

Even the darkest crevice in the valley of the shadow of death had a ray of light from above. My father‘s Parkinson’s caused tremendous pain and, left uncontrolled, was excruciating. Toward the end, he was suffering greatly while hospice struggled in vain to mitigate it. After many, many hours of this, my family and I reached a point of despair. We decided to send out an urgent prayer request for peace to as many people as possible. Moments later, my father became calm. Our prayers were answered. He remained peaceful until Jesus ultimately took him home. That was not a coincidence. Thank you for praying. It was yet another blessing that showed us God’s presence and grace. The greatest blessing is what dad enjoys right now, as he awaits the final resurrection in heaven with Jesus and all the saints. It’s the same blessing all believers can expect through the gracious death and resurrection of Jesus. Just think, one day, we’ll all be able to say thank you to Jesus in person. In the meantime, let’s get a lot of practice right here. Thank you, God.